


The First Fairy Tale Q Tells His Son~ Q Junior

by QOmnipotent



Category: Star Trek: Voyager
Genre: Fairy Tale Elements, Fairy Tale Parody, Gen, Silly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-06
Updated: 2017-08-06
Packaged: 2018-12-11 19:51:33
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,104
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11721375
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/QOmnipotent/pseuds/QOmnipotent
Summary: Q now a father of a brand new Savior Q, must tell the lad of his adventures with the crew of Voyager, and of his Godmother, Kathryn. Based loosely on the fable of The Three Bears. Mostly, this was tongue and cheek, and just a silly display of my writing prowess at the time.





	The First Fairy Tale Q Tells His Son~ Q Junior

**Author's Note:**

> I used to Roleplay on MySpace and then Roleplayer.me and even on Facebook. I still dabble and there were times when I attempted to goad other writers to spar in comments and collaborate. Sometimes it worked, but, other times it fell flat. This one received no commentary, and was intended to frazzle a writer of 'Admiral Janeway' and other members of the community that wrote characters from Voyager.
> 
>  
> 
> *Disclaimer: I don't the characters in my stories; Paramount Studios/CBS does, but I just borrow them from time to time.

Once upon a time there were Three Bears, who lived together in of all places a starship. One of them was a little, small, wee bear, named Neelix; and another was a middle-sized bear, named Kathryn; and the other was a great, big, huge oaf of a bear named Chuckles. Each of them had a pot for what delighted them most, and we’ll call it ‘porridge’ but in all honesty what meant porridge to each of them wasn’t porridge at all.

They each had their own chair, their own bed and most all their own duties, but they always seemed to be clinging ‘round the other.

One day, Neelix made porridge for their breakfast, lunch, or maybe because he was simply not getting enough attention; but for purposes of this story~we’ll say breakfast; because for all intensive matters~ it is meaningless why Neelix made porridge that day. Because that was his duty. Cook and whine whenever the middle-sized bear was around. So all was in order on the starship by this morning.

When Kathryn and Chuckles decided the porridge was too HOT this caused poor, neurotically selfish Neelix to sulk for about ten minutes, until Kathryn diluted the truth and lofted his self esteem with some arbitrary fact that meant only the world to Neelix; if only so that they could get on with their day or quite possibly their life. All three would leave the mess hall and agree that later they would return and choke down the porridge that Neelix had made. Neelix was happy, Kathryn could get to her duty of commanding the starship that was already lost in the Delta Quadrant; and Chuckles could continue to appear as though he belonged on this starship, just like a square peg belongs in a round hole. Of course, we won’t learn in this story why that was so ironic. You have until eternity~ Junior, so no worries.

While Neelix, Kathryn and Chuckles were away attending to their duties on the starship, the science officer of the ship slipped into the mess hall and proceeded to find the cooling porridge. Being as though Tuvok is from Vulcan and porridge is a grain based substance that is often mistaken for wallpaper paste in MOST cultures, but on Vulcan it looks like a delicacy that is only served on holidays and feasts~ Tuvok cannot resist. No one is around, and since he won’t get to go to any Vulcan reindeer games for a long time, it is LOGICAL in only his mind that he taste the porridge. Before he realizes he’s eaten all the porridge except for 3 tablespoonfuls. Quick thinking, which is what Vulcan’s are known for, when lying is not an option~ [because that area of their brains was removed when deciding which twin Romulus or Remus was the best.]; Tuvok chucks porridge and runs...

Tuvok leaves the mess hall at a run and knocks Harry Kim down in the corridor; and he doesn’t even look back as he heads to the bridge. Finding that Kathryn, Chuckles and Neelix have left now to go back to check on their porridge he smugly sits in Kathryn’s chair. Neither Neelix or Chuckles keep their chairs on the bridge; it’s against regulations on a starship. Tuvok looks smug and worried all at the same time. He gives an order that sends an already ‘lost’ ship in the Delta Quadrant off course. Harry Kim arrives to the bridge, fuming and outraged with the Vulcan’s rudenss and now realizes that he’s put the ship in danger of being REALLY lost. Tuvok laughs in the Ensign’s face.

Tuvok is suffering from porridge overload, but the EMH won’t discover it, Kes will...but I’m getting ahead myself.

Meanwhile, Kathryn, Neelix and Chuckles discover that the porridge is all gone. They fume, rant and rave~ well, that is not completely true; Neelix raves and rants while Kathryn and Chuckles look on amused. Kes arrives and saves the day as she pulls the porridge from the refrigerated area of the mess hall. She begins to clean the pans that once held the wall paper paste up once she has reassured the three Bears of their prized porridge. She begins to exclaim in a sweet and soft voice that she is NOT certain where the wall paper paste actually went to, but that when she returned to retrieve it she found it was all gone. In her ineffective manner of dealing with complex problems related to theft by design she fails to mention that she saw Tuvok running from the mess hall. Kathryn and Chuckles stare at her bewildered as to how this matters at all; while Neelix completely understands her inability to cope with lifes unfairness on a starship, despite that she doesn’t seem upset at all.

Now, all three bears nod at Kes with the idea that everything will work out in the end, just like the ship will magically leave the Delta Quadrant without assistance from Omnipotent beings. [Q laughs hysterically here for affect]; they then leave poor Kes to ascertain for herself where the wall paper paste may have disappeared to and leave the ships mess hall.

Tuvok, meanwhile is stuck in Kathryn’s chair. He’s in a coma and the EMH is on a coffee break. The three bears, Kathryn, Chuckles and Neelix return to the bridge satiated on porridge and discover Tuvok. Kathryn has him thrown in the brig without benefit of a trial for sleeping while on duty. Chuckles smirks at Neelix and Neelix attempts to rile Harry Kim, who is now elated that Tuvok has been placed in the brig~ for as he assumes for knocking him down in the corridor.

Kes arrives upon the bridge in time to save Tuvoks life by revealing that he actually ate wall paper paste; the EMH is dragged from his coffee break and recalibrated to doing whatever an EMH is supposed to do. Tuvok awakens and tearfully explains that wall paper paste on Vulcan is a delicacy and that he never meant to plow into Harry Kim, but he thought it was Neelix. Everyone is thrilled and pats one another on the back, they hug and Neelix plans another menu in his head where he will cook all the dishes without considering that Vulcans are also Vegans. Secretly, he now realizes that wall paper paste is deadly to Vulcans and he savors the idea.

The moral, son is this: Never let three bears get lost in the Delta Quadrant with other species and especially Vulcans, you never know what is going to happen next in the multiverse then.


End file.
